Renewal

Oh boy, it has been a while since my last update, two months have gone by, and to say that nothing has happened would be untrue, yet it feels like that to me.

Many things have passed me by, the holiday season, the ungrateful return to labor, the persistent writing block that attacks me every January and the blossoming of my characters in SWTOR. Also, I have not found a book to read, so I am reading 8 or nine books at the same time...a bit chaotic, the same way my head feels right now.

I will elaborate.

My wife and I love the holiday season, we love buying the Christmas tree and setting up the whole house to look like Santa's workshop. Our two kids love it also. So it was at this time, that the Beta weekends of SWTOR finally arrived, and with it a void had filled in my life but at the same time, the need to play an MMO had matured into a candid desire to just unwind from the inevitable horrors from work. The holiday season and SWTOR, who could ask for more?

December was not a good month at work, we did not have the amount work we needed to have, but it was a great month in terms of new beginnings, new clients, new and renewed hope. The last six months took a toll on me; I am tired of being tired, of being worried. But with the burden of potential doom, clarity came along, a frantic oasis of stillness that mitigated the overpowering sensation of loss. I could now breathe easier, I could sleep and rest and I could play and write and read.

Not so fast.

The playing part has been great. I have not felt the urge to play at all hours, at all times. The addiction is under control, so far. I am enjoying the game and I am taking my time to enjoy it...I will expand more on the game later. However, the writing and reading part is not going well. It seems that when I make a New Year's resolution, my real aim is to disregard anything associated with it. Thus, the elusive muse is still hiding, somewhere, inside my head and I can't seem to lure her out to the pages, where she belongs. The short story is coming along nicely, but slowly, the two novels want to burst out of me now, but when I work on them they retreat to their shadowy hiding place. I will finish the story soon, but I am afraid to set a due date, procrastination is an art form and I can perform it flawlessly. Such is life.

The writing conundrum has wrought havoc to my reading habits, and I have been unable to choose which book to read next, so I have been jumping from book to book to no avail. I am a creature of habit, I need uniformity, and I have not been able to get it so far this year, although February should be better.

The game is very good; it is a mesh of everything that is good from every MMO that came out before it, mixed with the brilliant Bioware story weaving and the immortal Star Wars series. I initially wanted to level up an Imperial Agent Sniper, and I am doing just so, but at a slower pace. The Agent is level 33, the Bounty Hunter is level 48, ready to hit 50 this week. Our guild, Soul Harvesters, has only one 50 so far, but that will change in the upcoming weeks.

So, I will try to write more, try to eat less (yes, the diet was one of many of my resolutions, along with not smoking, that so far, I have been able to maintain), try to sleep more, try to read a single book, or no more that three at a time, and be a better dad, husband, son, brother, writer, Guild Master and last, but not least, a better person.

See you all next week.